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Parenting Is An Art That Parents Often Fail To Master: Here Is How Children Are Affected By It

Yo! What’s up? How is it going? Let’s give a high-five to each other for getting through another week with more willpower and fortitude. Don’t be pushed by your problems for the weekend. Instead, get contained in inner and moral strength for peace.

“Children are not things to be moulded but people to be unfolded.” – Jess Lair (Author)

In today’s article, we will be focusing on parenting distinctly based upon emotional well-being. If you are a parent or going to become one or planning to have a kid, even if you are curious to understand where everything is going wrong – you’re in the right place. 

Disclaimer: I am not a mother or any professional advisor, but I am composing this article with a concern for the welfare of society.

If you are going to become a father or mother, how would that moment make you feel? It’s more than being happy, isn’t it? It is a very beautiful feeling for anybody. But more importantly, why do you think, few people question– “If you are ready for it?”

On the grounds of considering that as a huge commitment in your life, it is not only imperative for possessing financial wealth. But also, more importantly working towards impactful emotional and mental strength will automatically serve in the growth of mental health in children. Do you agree?

You might have come across, families devising the pregnant woman to consume nourishing nutrient-rich food, bearing in mind that the baby’s physical development is important. And that’s amazing. But, don’t you think? It’s necessary to provide sustenance for a healthy environment cultivating certain important elements concerning for the growth of psychological well-being.

The picture of mental health in any human being starts from the eighteenth week of pregnancy, where the development of the baby’s ear would take place. With time, science and technology has proved that by the twenty-sixth week of pregnancy, the baby will start reacting to noises.

If you had watched, Pasanga 2, during the prenatal development stage, Amala Paul and Surya would come together and contender for preparing and grounding their child in the context of good values, attitudes or morals through philosophy. Do you think it was only for the entertainment value? No. It has more to it. 

Previously, while I chose trauma as a theme in my articles, I mentioned how crucially important is 0-6 years in any individual’s life. Everything the parents’ say or do or acts with the respect to destructive and pathetic lifestyle through verbal or non-verbal actions, it gets vividly recorded in a person’s memory and directly or indirectly acts as powerful destruction to the child’s mental health. 

If you haven’t read my article (make sure to read it) https://whatsthehustle.in/2021/05/30/lets-talk-about-trauma-a-bruise-that-never-fully-heals/ 

It is very disappointing to see, from generations to generations considering our ancestors have passed on certain traditional values and wisdom that don’t help anybody as an individual to survive but focuses on the whole community’s validation. You can think of any and try reflecting it.

In any given situation, we don’t allow the kids to grip on their personalities regardless the parents and elders of the house mind bend their opinions and perspectives by outlining and infusing some amount of their outlook. In other words, the power of comprehension adds their essence of thinking that gives out the strong or weak mentality of succumbing to certain emotions. 

As a whole, a child can be compared to river water that flows freshly and people around them are responsible for polluting their ideologies. Growing up, most of you were not allowed to flexibly share your opinions, weren’t you? Why do you think so? We restricted to think and voice out.

Sometimes, we should go in consideration for making parenting courses available for the parents that can enable any parent to heal and outlandish their unconventional practices serving as a backbone for a healthy environment among the family members as a whole.

By not introducing to what parenting is – allows few kids to become the family’s scapegoat. The child either becomes sensitive, unhappy or vulnerable, ill. There is no such thing as a perfect parent. But you need to understand that it’s not your job to toughen your children to face the world. Instead make sure to speak to them as if they are the wisest, kindest, most beautiful humans on earth. For what they believe is what they will become. 

“A wise parent humours the desire for independent action, to become the friend and advisor when his absolute rule shall cease”

Kobe Bryant was the coach of the Mamba sports academy, while training the mentees he always made sure to tap into certain questions and under no circumstances he answered it for them. Preferably he provoked the children to kindle, ignite and excite by their ideas and views searching for the answers.

Now you might wonder, Kobe is a coach and I am a parent, that’s so right. But you must understand that parents are the first teachers of the children. Until they reach a certain age, parents are the only beings who they know. Parents should make sure to unlayer and recognise them as essentially distinctive person that will add more respect and love towards anyone in the future. 

Parents need to unlearn certain key factors for the betterment of their kid’s development. It’s understandable, as a parent, they would have gone through something in the course of life. But it’s not an excuse to destroy another individual’s psychological well-being, rather they can make sure to help their kid by explicitly giving an outline that would assist them in future.

In my personal opinion, when it comes to Indian families, the age of marriage is ideally set in the early 20s for girls and early 25s for boys. Altogether when they haven’t experienced anything in their life as a whole, they are assigned with lot of responsibilities and this seems absurd to me. 

We don’t make sure if somebody is ready for it. As a matter of choice for large communities, cross-validation becomes more important. These young people are defined with many roles that the world moulds to fit in anywhere and everywhere.

PS: If you reached the end of this article, please make sure to comment below your thoughts and how was your childhood? Or what are your views about parenting as a whole? Much love to y’all. Have a great day ahead. 

Author’s Note:

Lately, I have been observing a lot of you commenting on my timeline. Thank you for those sweet words. And I appreciate you for taking the time to read and leave a comment. If you want me to write on any particular topic, please feel free to comment below. Have a great day ahead!

1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. sou

    June 28, 2021 at 7:52 pm

    Ramya, your article is absolutely exquisite. This is about 4k words but captures all the small and important essence of parenthood. I’m mindblown how well you’re able to articulate and explain things in a way alot of people can understand. This is an incredible article, with incredible attention to detail, and research. This seems like an article written by a professional journalist. You did an incrible job, I’m so fascinated and proud of you! I’m really hoping I can learn to write like this.

    Also, I love the part where you wrote “It is not your job to toughen up your children to face life.” god I would love to have a conversation to you about all of this. I have many thoughts.

    As a person with parents who dont know how to parent, I can agree with half of this. I think of all the kids out in the world with parents not knowing how to take care of themselves let alone a child and I’m filled with worry. I think my childhood obviously had a lot to do with my overall development, my personal triumphs as well as challenges that i’ve overcome, and still struggle with. I think of reasons why that is and almost all the time it’s either school or what i was condition to believe was right by my parents not knowing how to handle a child or handle themselves.
    I feel as though parenting, especailly in india is GLORIFIED (and we can chat on whatsapp why i think this) and people dont pay enough attention to 1) financial well being 2) mental health (especially their)

    – soundarya

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